Day 347

Today's Lesson:

Anger must come from judgment. Judgment is
The weapon I would use against myself,
To keep the miracle away from me.

Father, I want what goes against my will, and do not want what is my will to have. Straighten my mind, my Father. It is sick. But You have offered freedom, and I choose to claim Your gift today. And so I give all judgment to the One You gave to me to judge for me. He sees what I behold, and yet He knows the truth. He looks on pain, and yet He understands it is not real, and in His understanding it is healed. He gives the miracles my dreams would hide from my awareness. Let Him judge today. I do not know my will, but He is sure it is Your Own. And He will speak for me, and call Your miracles to come to me.

Listen today. Be very still, and hear the gentle Voice for God assuring you that He had judged you as the Son He loves.

Miracles I'm noticing:

There is a theme of peace and quiet running through the recent lessons, and I am beginning to understand more and more what one teacher I've been working with means when she talks about how our minds spin ... and also about our monkey mind. My ego is running my subconscious and as I get quiet, I realize that the thoughts that seem to take over automatically have not been from my Higher Self, but from the ego. It's really great to notice that I can tell the difference now and I'm noticing that those ego thoughts are not as prevalent as they used to be.

As I become more aware, it is really fun to notice that when I'm not really paying attention and then suddenly am aware of my thoughts, there are times now when I don't recognize the ego. I'm aware that the Holy Spirit - my Higher Self - is coming through those ego thoughts. I was going to say that the H.S. is beginning to reprogram the ego's subconscious, but I don't think that's how it works. The H.S. is the default - that's what is there and always has been there - it is the ego that has reprogrammed the original subconscious, so I think it's more a matter of remembering than reprogramming.

In one of her lectures Marianne Williamson talks about how sometimes behavior modification is the way we need to work back to Spirit because we "fake it 'til we make it" so we can get used to that "new" way of seeing the world. She says we may not have gotten to the point yet where we don't think those negative thoughts, but at least we can notice that we aren't saying what we're thinking when we think those thoughts, and that's progress.

My other teacher, Isis, says that we really can make up our minds to totally eliminate the ego if that's what we really want. It does take some concerted effort. She says there is no need for the baby steps if we just make up our minds. But I find that being aware of my progress does help me and I am noticing a big difference in my mind, even if people around me don't notice as much (I've been a good faker so people don't always notice my progress).

What I've noticed most for myself is my own authenticity and I think those closest to me notice that, too, because they were the ones to bear the me that came out when the guard came down. It's like when teachers tell parents that their young children are angels at school and the parents are shocked because they are devils at home. That's how I think I've been at times, and that's the progress I can measure.

So if we eliminate judgment - one area I'm still noticing that rears its ugly head at times - then we can eliminate anger. Let's give our judgment - and our anger - to the Holy Spirit so we don't have to worry about that anymore. When we are still and listen, we notice that the Holy Spirit has done the judging for us, and we have been judged as a Son of God. It doesn't get any better than that!